Things Bengali moms say to their kids and need to stop right now
If you’re a Bengali growing up in a different city other than Kolkata, up north mainly. You must have always stood apart in any type of group while growing up. While you all were never asked by your Bengali moms to do the 16 somvar ka vrat. The battles with your mother were on a different level. So here are 10 things Bengali moms say that you have experienced at any point in your lifetime.
This list is a self-note from not sinking into the same-old trope.
1. Ei pronam koro
Meaning touches the feet of the elders to get blessings. A traditional form of showing admiration and respect to the elders. However, you’re expected to follow this order at the most awkward places like railway stations, shopping malls, puja pandals, etc. The weird part is you have to do this to a random stranger whom your mom had met for like 20 years ago, probably in a bus.
2. Boro hoye gechis erom korte nei
Every Bengali child has heard this phrase at least once in their lifetime. It means you’re too mature to behave this way. Bengali parents might throw at you probably for shaking your legs while sitting at a chair or arguing as a teenager or even as a grown-up. Her reply will be the same, with an enduring expression.
3. Sweater poro, tupi poro, jacket poro
Things bengali moms say will always include feeling cold on behalf of everyone. And her children will always be on top of the list. So, before the actual winter hits, this is what is expected to hear every day. You better take out your monkey-caps.
4. Eto thanda ice-cream kheo na!
Okay, this is my personal favourite one. It means the ice-cream is very cold for you to eat. Umm.. that is why it is called ICE-cream mom! Bengali moms will always make you melt your ice-cream first and then let you have it. And if you catch seasonal flu it will always be the last cold drink or the ice cream you had.
5. Classey first ke elo?
Bengalis take academic achievements very personally. Who came first in class and by how many marks did she or he beat you is very important. All our grandparents often had Masters, studied until they literally burnt their lamps. Hence, a DDLJ scene where the father celebrates his son’s flunking and offers him a Europe tour NEVER EVER happening in a Bengali household.
6. Rekhe dao onno karur kaaje lagbe pore…
Meaning not throwing anything away rather give it to someone else who can use it. A very middle-class thing, which means that in a Bengali house there is barely any space for new things except for books. The worst side of this keeping aside things can be a poetry written by you which might embarrass you by turning up after 15 years. Or the report cards, I swear that was the scariest part in my case. The bright part is that my son rides the same tricycle which my brother and I did.
7. Chuti mane porashona bondho kore sarakhon ghure berabe?
Roughly means, do holidays stand for no study but just roaming around? You will be hearing her favourite words “Porte bosh” every now and then which means to sit and study. Once you are preparing for secondary school, she will not let you be without books for a minute till you finish your board exams. These lines are repeated at every interval irrespective of how occupied they are with their chores.
You will know that holidays are over when you hear her scream “sondhye hoye gechey eibare porte bosh” meaning it is time for you to return to your books at dusk. All of these things might or might not have any relation to what you are doing at the given point of time.
8. Maach na kheye kheye erom boka toiri hoyechis!
Eating fish is directly proportional to being brainy. You complain about anything, your mothers only solution to it all will be eating fish. She will make sure you complete your homework on time and be the genius of the class.Not sure how fish plays an important role in everything but she will blame your poor eyesight on not eating enough fish everyday. It is a little weird how most bong kids have to wear specs before passing out from school after eating all that maach that they do.
9. Durga Pujo aschey, Bari kobe phirbe?
Durga Puja comes with the longing for home. For bongs situated outside the city , not being able to be at home during pujo can be equal to a heart-break. Now that adult life pushes people to leave the city but leaving the city during durga puja will make hell break loose at home. She will use all sorts of ways be it emotional or otherwise to convince you to be back in no time. And even after all this while if the answer is no then be ready to face the famous dialogue of every mother that there is …. “ boro hoye gecho , ja bhalo bujhbe koro!’
10. Kothaye acho? Kokhon phirbe? Kar sathe jaccho? Number diye jao!
Your mother needs to know everything. It hardly matters if you are 16 or 26 years old, you have to update her about every single detail of your whereabouts. Where are you and with whom? How long will it take and why? How will you return ? so on and so forth… YOU have to answer these questions irrespective of being an adult, living on your own in a different city, being married or a parent yourself…
Bengali mothers are very compassionate but at the same time slightly controlling. They face difficulty in trying to let go of their kids irrespective of their age but however they should learn how to. This might help to ease their relationships with their kids who otherwise become annoyed because of their controlling behaviour. Needless to say, our mothers are always very loving and caring and no person can replace them in our lives.
Make sure to check out Things that make Kolkata the city of joy.
You might as will be interested in 10 Things to do in West Bengal 2021.